Wednesday, April 20

Planned Insanity

Ok, so I have fallen behind a bit here (as usual), so I need to get myself on a "schedule" of some sort so that I can keep up!
I have come to realize lately that I am no good at handling stress or change. Which would explain why my offspring lacks this skill as well. I even, for the most part, hate surprises. I am a person that loves to have a plan and live by it. I person that relies on what she expects to happen. The problem with this mode of life is that life is not like that. Not at all. Things happen. Shit happens. Things rarely go as planned and you can't plan for everything. So when these little surpises happen *poof*, I flip! I go into a two year old temper tantrum, with the full kicking and screaming. I know it is childish and impractical, but it is me. So, now as I am faced with my impending move, I am in a constant state of frazzledness. (is that even a word?) I am in a permanent state of STRESS! I hate change and moving is one of the largest forms of change that there is. And then, there is the packing and cleaning factor. Two more of my least favorite words. And worse yet...... I have no plan!! YIKES. So, my melt down has begun. No sleep, too much eating, and worse yet, the bitchiness. I am in perma-bitch mode, look out. I can't relax at all and that causes my alter ego to emerge and chew everyone's head off.

Also, not planned, I have quit the part time job and I have to say although it was not planned, I am quite happy with this change. It seemed that between my regular job, being a mom and working this part time job, I had no down time, no "me" time. Also, it was sucking the life out of me. It was making me so unhappy and everytime I had to work, I was angry. Everytime I left work, I was angry and even thinking about it made me angry. So, will money be tight - YES! But I had to do it for my sanity. I took the job with the thought that I would be scrapbooking and teaching scrapbooking, which I love, but I am not doing that anymore, I only straighten stickers and vacuum. So my dream job had turned into a craft janitorial job! I hope that even though it will be rough financially, I will be happier and that is (as they say in the commercial) PRICELESS!

My boss has left the coutry, again, for two weeks so I am enjoying my first day of freedom. I have big plans to keep up on my blog, catch up on my crafts, surf the web for new and interesting things and just relax. I love this job, the freedom and casualness of it, delights me!

My man hunt is still on! I have not been actively pursuing men, but in my head, I am! I have also decided that about 10 pounds have to go! Men like the skinny and skinny I am not, anymore. So, with good intention, I bought a pair of yoga pants at the second hand store (gotta love $2 pants!) and I even put them on yesterday because I was going to go on a long vigorous walk. But then I saw how tight the pants were and didn't like my thighs in them, so I took them off, put on my trusty pj pants and ate an ice cream sandwich instead. So, my skinny plan is not going wel right now, but I am going to get off my butt and do it!! (need to psyche myself up!)

So, off to drink my diet pepsi and make some cards, only 40 more to go! I am always procrastinating!! Bad bad girl! At least the pepsi is diet! Leave you with this quote:

"I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the ones you get in diamonds." - Mae West

PS. I did send off my stuff to try and get published, so at least my ADD didn't stop me there!

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